Snip-Snap

Most of the time we know what we need to do to fix our lives. Maybe it's going to school, getting a new job, getting rid of bad habits, and sometimes, it's getting rid of people that make our lives just that much worse. There are those rare occasions when your heart and mind agree and it's a matter of just saying that you can no longer be a friend/more than a friend. You realize that everything is wrong and you would be both better off without each other. Then, there are the multitudes of occasions when your mind is set on this idea but your heart will not let go... It has to be the most frustrating stalemate in the history of human emotion. Just as one of my closest friends is going through this now, I think I am too - or rather, I might be there soon. My friend is troubled - these questions and feelings bother her and no rationale can help win over her heart. What is this weird connection we have to others that makes it impossible to imagine every day life without them? Even when they're not physically there and you are surrounded by others, you feel that there's something missing. You feel alone. A crushing loneliness. A great weapon your heart pulls out when your mind starts rationalizing and debating. For a little while I thought that was the reason my heart was clinging on and not letting go but now I know better. I'm not afraid of being alone. I've been by myself plenty of times (refer to my love for the Bridget Jones' matra "All By Myself"). I like doing things by myself: taking walks, shopping, cooking... No, no. Loneliness is a great weapon - touche Brain - but it's not the deciding factor. Sometimes I wish it was just that easy to snip-snap and cut people out of your life. Just like that, without any regret or feelings. But only the right people. And how do you know which ones are the ones you should cut out and which ones need to be kept close? My brain and heart can't seem to agree. I'm not putting away the scissors, but I'm not about to cut things to shreds either.